Be your own light
A lantern in the mist
Meet me by the morning
On the corner of night
Where mist rises
And hope’s in sight
(Lemn Sissay)
Sometimes I feel as if I am wandering through the mist, searching, seeking, trying to find my way, but stumbling and falling with each step. The mist within my mind stops me from seeing my way ahead and I just can’t seem to find my way forwards. I get stuck and don’t know where to start. In these moments it can be worth stopping, sitting back, and resting into the white cloak that surrounds me and waiting.
Sinking into the soft cloud of the unknown, can be a difficult place to be. But it does provide an opportunity to pause, tune inwards and try to see things from a new perspective.
When we sit back and wait, we can pause and wonder about what might be hidden within those clouds. What mysteries could be waiting? What magic could be hidden inside?
When we start to get curious about what is waiting to be found, we can then take one step forwards. We can begin by feeling the earth beneath our feet and connecting to the ground of our body. Instead of searching through our mind for the answers, we can feel into our feet, the sensations in our body and explore how this feels. Then tentatively take another step forwards, feeling called by the solidity of the present moment.
This is where it all starts, we move our focus from our foggy mind into the solid ground of our body, then build our awareness from there. Tuning in first to our physical sensations, and our breath, then to our feelings, thoughts and emotions and finally to all the things that are holding us back. Taking one gentle step at a time as we rest into mindful awareness of how we are in each moment.
This is how we find our way through the haze and become our own guiding light, a lantern in the mist.
Be an Island or Lamp to Oneself
Buddha taught that we should be an island (or lamp) to ourselves.
The Buddhist text Attadiipaa Sutta describes Buddha’s last teaching. When Buddha was sick and his friend asked him for some final words he said:
“Ānanda, be your own island, your own refuge, with no other refuge. Let the teaching be your island and your refuge, with no other refuge.”
Buddha is telling his friend not to seek refuge outside of himself, that he has within him, the biggest island of all.
Diipa can mean both "island" (dviipa) and "lamp" (diipa), so we can be an island to rest onto, and a lamp that guides the way.
Within each us we have a spark of light, a place we can rest and seek refuge and we can find this through our meditation and mindfulness practice. By tuning inwards and becoming familiar with this island of stillness, and the light of our awareness we will always have a place of refuge within.
In the text Buddha tells us how to be the light by simply contemplating the Four Foundations of Mindfulness:
Mindfulness of body (kāyā)
Mindfulness of feelings (vedanā)
Mindfulness of mind/heart (citta)
Mindfulness of mind contents (dhamma)
By being aware of our own life experience and noticing our body, our feelings, our mind and our qualities of mind, we can develop our own inner wisdom and be our own inner light.
Mindfulness of our body includes being aware of our breath, our body position, whether sitting, laying, standing or walking. Noticing the sensations in our body and being mindful of our daily activities. This can lead to developing our insight and inner wisdom, allowing us to live with more self-awareness and kindness.
Mindfulness of our feelings includes being aware of our reactions, our habits and unhelpful patterns of behaviour. It helps us see our judgments and reveals what we are resisting or craving. This guides us towards letting go of those unhelpful habits so we can develop more peace and equanimity.
Mindfulness of our mind includes being aware of our emotions, thoughts and memories, and the stories we create in our mind. By practising meditation we can develop our focus and concentration, stay in the present moment and release those unhelpful stories so that we can see things how things really are.
Mindfulness of our mind contents includes being aware of the things that hold us back, such as desire, anger, sloth, restlessness and doubt. These five hindrances, along with Buddha’s other teachings can guide us towards the light, towards freedom and towards a clear and calm state of mind.
Mindfulness helps us get to know and understanding ourselves better, to develop more love, care and compassion for all of our human experiences, so that we can be kinder to ourselves and others. This is the light, the lamp, the island, coming back to the present moment, resting on our breath, observing our experiences and focusing our mind on a meditation practise. This is how we find our freedom, our inner light and our peace of mind. This is how we become the light within lantern.
So, today if you are feeling stuck, pause for a moment and notice, then take one small step towards awareness. Feel your feet on the ground, breathe slowly and deeply and just notice, not trying to fix anything or change anything, just be with open awareness and a kind and gentle heart.
If you would like help with your mindful awareness you can try:
✨ Guided Meditations on my Soundcloud page.
✨ Mindfulness courses and membership on my online learning page.
✨ Mindful Living Coaching, read more on my website.
Discover more about the four foundations of mindfulness at:
https://www.spiritrock.org/practice-guides/the-four-foundations-of-mindfulness
Learn about the Five Hindrances with Nick Hashemi:
The Mindfulness Mentor: Peace Notes from a Former Monk